This part is a collection of posts from my days as the MD blogger. I was in Maktab Duli from 2005-2006 and here are some of the colourful incidences and tales that happened during my time there.

(The titles of the post are in bold.)

I had the time of my life

July 26, 2006 at 3:16 pm · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails

Ever heard the phrase ‘expect the unexpected’? I’m sure most of you would have heard of it. The C_I_A definitely knows this phrase and on occasion have been known to use it. My crazy leek plant was half-eaten by a green jelly bean. See, that wasn’t expected.

It was a dark and stormy day in a desolate corner of MDland and the C_I_A was undoubtedly up to crazy things. I was doing math- which for a fact is one of the most hated things I can think of doing. By the way, I don’t even take math; nevertheless there I was doing some trigonometry questions.

As I pondered the wisdom of the mathematicians gone past, something caught my attention. I have a limited attention span, so this was clearly something good. I left my stuff there and the blistering MD winds destroyed it. I believe to this day some of the C_I_A’s paper can be found floating up there in the sky, just like everything else that I’ve lost.

Well, the thing that distracted me was a thing. See, unexpected. Remember, expect the unexpected. I ran as quickly as I could and reached the relative safety of the Bio labs. There it was the thing which distracted me from my pursuit of mathematical excellence. It was a- thing!

I don’t know what it is but there it was, a thing lying on the ground. Let me now proceed to describe it. It is approximately 5-8 cm long and about 1 cm apart. It is cylindrical in shape and has a spongy end on one side with an opening in the other.

All I knew it was a communist tool. Communists are people who share their stuff for the good of the many i.e. they don’t believe in keeping something for themselves. As MD is a major institution which believes in communism- its motto is ‘Sharing is caring’. Hello? Sharing is caring? To me that just screams communism, I bet Mao Zedong is laughing in his grave.

In MD a communist can be distinguished by their unique scent. After all they involve themselves in community work at designated places in MDland. These activities’ known as ‘inhalation’ is a major part of their communist manifest. In layman’s term, they socialise by smoking cigarettes together.

Thank you for bearing with me through this unintelligible piece of work. I needed to kill boredom and this was the way I did it. Oh ya I found a cigarette! It was the cigarette which distracted me from my math. I don’t smoke so I gave it to a cat. As far as I know the cat finished it alone and went to the mall and lived happily ever after.

The moral of this story- cigarette is no good. Why? I didn’t finish my math. Please MDians don’t smoke; you’ll become a communist like the North Koreans. Who knew such a humble invention like the cigarette could turn you into a communist. Note to readers, if you find any of my math stuff do give it back.

As a conclusion, please accept my sincerest apology for making you read nothing. Well, almost nothing and if anyone feels offended by my nonsense, just quit smoking would you?

Don’t Talk, Lets Think About It

July 24, 2006 at 12:13 pm · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails

I wonder what it’s all about. The strangest thing happened in MDland last Thursday. A good acquaintance of mine got involved in a fight. The saga began late Wednesday afternoon and as I, the C_I_A believe is still ongoing. The issue is who’s right and what really happened.

Laughing as usual, I sat at HQ looking at reports when I felt that something was amiss. I decide I should go out and go gather some intelligence. I went to look for my crazy gang of friends. It was recess in MDland and something big had clearly happened.

An acquaintance of mine had just punched someone. According to eyewitnesses, he just started punching him for no reason. Never wanting to believe any story I hear, I checked with my own sources. Apparently, there was a reason for my friend’s behavior and his actions.

The C_I_A gathered that it was about a girl and something the guy did to piss off my friend. I could elaborate but I refuse in order to comply with strict confidentiality clauses in the Agency. Basically, the guy did something to the girl which made my friend angry.

The C_I_A believes in non-violence and condemns all acts of violence. I think what my friend did was wrong but what the guy did was also wrong. Now, the guy’s gang and his brothers are looking for my friend, they want to teach him a lesson. The guy was lightly injured as a result of my friend’s action. In fact, all he got was a bruised cheek. Sadly he’s making a big deal about the small boo-boo.

As usual there are two sides to a story and the guy isn’t telling his half of it. The part about what he did to the girl and the part about his friends/gang beating up my friend. Let’s just come clean and settle this matter as diplomatic as possible. The C_I_A thinks that it is just stupid to prolong this thing. The school should punish my friend, but they should also find out the truth.

End of MD-utopia..

July 17, 2006 at 12:14 pm · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails

How many shades are there in rainbow? Easy! 7!

Hahaha..

That was so foolish.

Detachment from reality is dangerous but it makes that person naïve and in a positive light, innocent. If you don’t know about it, how can you fear it right? Well, all people have their own fears and these can be manifested in many different ways. From phobias to absurd excuses people will do anything to keep them from facing their fears.

My worst fear, the C_I_A’s worst fear happened last week- the SA (that despised organisation whose members take joy in punishing MDians) went on a witch hunt.

It was break time, a time when all teaching stopped and boredom levels in MDland decreased, when a band of renegade SA operatives went on a prowl. It was all too familiar as the alarms in the HQ rang. A monitor labeled Feed A was showing a SA operative actively on the move in the library.

What in demons name is this? The SA out in force and targeting fashion conscious students! Come on, wearing ties are troublesome and on some people it’s like watching the Hindenburg burn to the ground. Ties suck the life out of a person.

The HQ went on stealth mode and other hidden cameras in MDland were activated. First in the library then outside, the SA was in concert. It was a full-fledged assault against individuality.

Individuality and expressionism in MD is as good as dead. Ties were compulsory, badges were compulsory and socks necessarily need to be white. The SA wants to see a uniform MD society, all generic, all looking the same.

Later that day, in a meeting at the HQ with members of the Intelligence, the true scale of the situation was contemplated. The communists (smokers) were being hunted, the white collars (tie haters) were being forced to wear ties and the magicians (escapists) were being sent in their dozens to counseling.

Hahahaha..

Funny.

Come, the communists, white collars and magicians will be united against the threat posed by the SA. The SA and their allies- the newly appointed MPs and prefects, will try their best but they will meet stiff resistance. Expressionism and individuality will live in MDland.

In my absentia

July 13, 2006 at 10:00 am · Author: C_I_A · Filed under General

Sorry for the long absence, its been a busy couple of weeks. First it was the AS exams then my schedule just couldn’t allow me more time to write so the lack of posts on this blog.

In that period of absence a lot has happened in MDland. The C_I_A noted these happenings and should’ve and ought to post on these matters from my own twisted and sometimes ignorant perspective.

Nevertheless, the C_I_A’s back and with the World Cup done for and buried, there’s absolutely nothing for me to watch on TV. So here are some posts or what I collectively call articles that I’ve been working on during my period of absence.

If you want me to write about something (issues, hot gossip, inside information etc..) in MDland just leave a comment and perhaps I’ll see to it.

Things to cure boredom #1

July 13, 2006 at 9:56 am · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails

It was a spur of the moment thing.and as usual in the scenic surroundings of MD there was a short supply of fun things to do. so here in this crazy journal, i, the C_I_A will chronicle more things that you MDians could try to alleviate yourself from boredom. oh ya, alleviate means to get rid off, so use it in your essays. okay, where was i, oh ya, how to get rid of boredom…

It was one of those days and the C_I_A was doing nothing in particular with almost all my classes canceled that day so i like a majority of MDians was strating to feel bored. i searched for something to do except for my teacher’s work of course! i walked the pathways and looked hither and thither for acquaintances and in the serene and regal setting of the ball, i found them.

It was the infamous A-team, consisting of the two A’s. they were in the ball and seemingly they were revising their knowledge of the earth. i having no particular thing to study for, approached cautiously for fear of disturbing their revision. the C_I_A was amazed with their resolute looks as they tried to recall and remember knowledge long forgotten. it was a sight that would make their teachers shed a tear. however, it was short-lived.

Not long after, one of the A’s dissapeared leaving the other alone. feeling slightly rejected, the other A fished out his phone and played an mp3 for his own delight. the C_I_A would rather be somewhere else rather than sit with this A and listen to his devilish songs but i didn’t run away. well, as A and i sat listening to his unique brand of music, a white and salty mist befell us.

It was then that the other A shouted from atop and in his hands was a contraption unlike any other. It was a fire extinguisher! he was clearly elated as he sprayed the damn thing on us down below. not wanting to be called cowards, A and i remained seated as the crazy A above rained us with fire fighting foam.

My boredom was miraculalously cured. My dear MDians if ever you feel bored, just pick up a fire extinguisher and spray it at your friends. they wouldn’t mind, it’ll make them laugh and if you really get into it, you can make a career out of it.

Of dragons and toilets..

July 13, 2006 at 9:53 am · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails

Absurdity has return and after weeks of drought, inspiration has again assailed me. Wise men once said that stupidity knows no bounds and so I have created a tale based on real characters of MD in which nothing but stupidity and absurdity will be told.

It was high noon; my company and I were sitting minding our own business when the call of stupidity beckoned. The infamous dragons of MD were abroad and being descendants of great huntsman ourselves, we set out on a hunt for dragons.

The dragons are found throughout the lands of MD and although they are plenty in number, seldom had MDians seen them. They are fierce creatures with hardened scaly skin, pale orange in colour and we think they’d be good if we can keep them as pets maybe even tasty if deep-fried.

So as we languished i.e. struggled under the heat of the sun, I as the ‘Eye’ of the company spotted a dragon. Being alerted from boredom I called the great hunter of the company, ‘A’ whom before had captured other fabled creatures of MD.

He sounded the horn and the great dragon hunt was on. Off we went in a band of absurdity bringing great weapons such as canon gauntlets (a.k.a paper balls) and cages of fire (a.k.a plastic bag) as well as great swords of crystal (a.k.a plastic ruler).

Chased and chased we did across the plains of MD, but the dragon was swift and hid up a great tree it did. ‘A’ being the boldest, climbed up but no sign of the dragon was found. So end the dragon quest in failure but be warned dragons! We, the absurd company are after your kind! If ever we caught you to the dungeons of will your kind be kept!

Note: A few eons later, the absurd company did manage to capture the dragons. What joy, what jubilation! (i.e. untold happiness) The dragons as it seem were able to change colours, had long nails and has a sensitive tail. Though we only caught one dragon, the purpose of the quest was forever fulfilled and so end this epic tale. P.s. the dragon was safely kept in a bottle until Crocodile Hunter came and released it into a habitat.

Do u see what I see?

May 29, 2006 at 12:08 pm · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails

Something seems amiss. Something is wrong. The C_I_A was driving around MD the other day (some time ago) when inadvertently an agent spotted a camera in the toilet by the temple of knowledge in the upper quadrant of MD. Deploying our best agents, the C_I_A soon found out that the camera had mysteriously appeared between around 0800hrs to 0930 hrs that day.

Instantly the C_I_A’s contact at the prestigious Uncle Sam’s Club (a.k.a the SA) was tapped. The informant said that whoever installed the camera wasn’t associated with Uncle Sam. Very interesting, a camera in MD and not installed by the admin, who would be behind such things we asked. The C_I_A’s senior conspiracy theorist, John Legend came up with a conclusion, that the camera was the work of the Director.

The Director is the same mythical person who made the MD porn videos and according to John Legend, the Director has moved on to voyeurism (a.k.a peeping at people) or so it seems. The C_I_A immediately rejected this theory and decided to contact our partners at the C_I_A’s counter-agency- S.I.V.A which is concerned with matters that are beyond the borders of MD like spying in other schools.

The boss of S.I.V.A, Marksman, said that even his agents were baffled. Not wanting to be defeated by the mysterious entity which installed the camera, the C_I_A assembled a team of the best spies and agents in its arsenal. Dubbed Mission: Important 3, the team consisted of 3 agents and was tasked with the job of taking down the camera at all possible costs.

At an unspecified time in an unspecified place a team of 3 classified agents, penetrated the toilet. After deactivating the power supply for the whole building and sweeping the camera for any radio signals, the agents then swiftly removed the cover. Oh my god! Agent 2244 exclaimed as he held aloft the yellow device found within the camera’s case.

The device measuring approximately 4cm by 6cm was then carefully checked. “Curse You, What the @#%*!!!�? as agent 2567 examined the device. Owing to the Official Secrets Act 1947, the C_I_A is bound by law not to state what it found in the camera’s case that day or acknowledge it. However, since then the C_I_A’s operatives has removed the device from the gent’s toilet and it is now safe again for you people to use the toilet for general use or for ‘inhalement’ activities.

P.s~ By the time u read this, ‘real’ cameras might have been installed by the prestigous Uncle Sam’s Club XD~

Rainbows in the head

May 13, 2006 at 11:12 am · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails

It was a fair and fine night and I was up looking at the stars and when it’s all quite, the beauty of the heavens is breathtaking. The stars seem as beautiful as they glittered about the emptiness of space and when looking at them it gives new meaning to the word ‘far’. I’m not going to talk about stars but about physics and how a few months back it inspired me to write a tale so nonsensical, its genius. Here is that tale.

The class has just begun and immediately boredom set in, for you see physics is one of the most interestingly boring classes that I had in my fixed schedule. No sooner was I engulf with taking down the notes that I entered a magnificently magical world…

The teacher with his rainbow-coloured hair and his groovy spectacles, the book of Hutching floating in the air in majesty and us, the disciples learning every word of Hutching’s so that we too may possess rainbow-coloured hair and float about the air not so in majesty but in lunacy.

It is a world filled with joy. The joy of learning the relation between density, area and whether or not it is proportional to volume and which law governs such a thing. “Hahahaha…�? rings the laughter of the disciples as the rainbow-haired master demonstrates Young’s double slit experiment and behold we were transported into the realms of physics like magic.

For you see, ‘c’ represents the speed of light and only in physics such craziness is accepted whereas in kindergarten we were taught that ‘c’ is for cat. “Hahahaha…�?, again laughed the disciples as the rainbow-haired master tells us that the Avogadro constant is found in the formula sheet. The master again proves he is an absolute genius as 0K is known as absolute zero.

“Hahahaha…�? we laughed when the rainbow-haired master tells us that only 3 people pass the notoriously hard and crazy to do Common Test whose questions come from not the mind of any living man but from the books of the long dead Hutching’s. now that we know that physics is a hard to crack, tough as steel and cold as ice subject, we the disciples rejoice as we float in the air (impossible as it seems), scratching our rainbow-coloured hair and saying, “Hahahaha.. What’s that you say, Hutching’s is still alive, well then I’ll be a dead rat!!!�?

What’s this happiness what’s this joy? Well, it is the joy of physics and learning that everything in the world can be explained by some unbelievable theory in physics. So if you don’t take physics there is something very wrong with you or is it something wrong with me. As a wise physicist once said, “The very existence of the Universe and all that happens in it can be explained only by physics”.

So here ends in a sad note this crazy tale, for Hutching’s was found dead in his bedroom, floating in the air with his face covered in his long rainbow-coloured hair. Just as a fact, his cause of death was a supernova-induced big bang.

Looking with eyes half-open

May 13, 2006 at 10:53 am · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails

Stupidity if it may be called a resource would be ranked as a renewable resource as it will, shall and must never run out. If you think what makes a person different is their looks or personality, then you might be right but one thing that distinctly identifies a person is his stupidity.

Ever since the dawn of humanity, humans love to judge each other and that’s why God created us in many different colours and forms. So that we can judge each other, fight each other, get sick of one another and then love one another. The ability to judge a person is a very important skill so now the C_I_A has come up with the 5-step sure success fail-proof judge another person method.

In order to be a successful judge of character a person has have these tendencies, have the ability to stare without blinking for long periods, have a wide social circle with a loose structure and finally the ability to do some tracking and fact-finding. What the C_I_A means with a wide social circle is to have a lot of agents or what you normal people call friends. Tracking and fact-finding requires someone with knowledge of the person you are judging (this does not imply stalking but if it helps go right ahead).

The five steps are Observe, Fact-gathering, Observe, Gossip and Observe. Okay, it’s actually 3 steps but since the C_I_A is a not a distinguished mathematician of any sort do forgive us. No need to explain about observing as anyone who isn’t blind can do that but fact-gathering requires accuracy and precision. It involves finding out the person’s details but not too personal as that will be considered stalking. So if you’ve managed to find out details such as name, phone number, home address, car license plate and the person’s hang-out place you have just qualified as a first-rate stalker(please pat yourself on the back).

The aim of judging people is to find suitable friends or even soul mates but most of the time it’s just for killing boredom. Gossiping about a person also requires skills known as discretion. This is where you only dish the dirt with your trusted friends who won’t double-cross and backstab you. FYI, the C_I_A has been backstabbed, double-crossed, and triple-crossed and even crossed countless times (Curse all thy that have crossed, double/triple-crossed and backstabbed the C_I_A for vengeance shall be ours!).

So now that we are experts in judging people, we just need to practice it to sharpen our skill and learn to classify people according to their categories. In this respect some of the common theories of categorising people are the Theory X and Theory Y. Theory X implies that people are just plain dumb, stupid and includes people who are annoying to look at, think they’re funny and dress weird while Theory Y believes that everyone is the same except in intellect and looks.

As the C_I_A likes to say looks is only skin deep so judge a person not only by their looks but by their IQ plus personality plus stupidity. So remember perform a thorough background analysis before you choose that next friend.

Acc-zi-dents !

May 13, 2006 at 10:49 am · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails

How far can one really believe in accidents being one-off, random and unpredictable events? The C_I_A personally does not believe in accidents being random things but through the C_I_A’s ultra-secret back room dealings with the Mafioso and them dirty no good FBI we’ve this to say.

Accidents will be redefined as non-random events which occur with precise frequency over a large distribution of numbers and can be influenced by several unrelated factors. You can accept this definition or this one which says that an accident is planned by some no good, damn crap, piece of shit that doesn’t have anything better to do but mess up someone’s life. What the hell?

Hell, yes because when you get involved in an accident it steadily worsens (i.e. from not so OK to KO to Bad to Terrible). Now do you get my point? What the C_I_A is trying to say is that accidents are planned by some shadowy organisation even more shadowy than the C_I_A like the scum from the FBI. If you still don’t buy this argument then don’t you wonder why there are tow-trucks immediately after an accident even when no one calls, it’s the work of that shadowy organisation we’ll tell ya.

Even worse is that you’ll lose money when you get involved in these accidents. So the C_I_A has asked congress to rename accidents into just “dents�? as the pre-fix “acci�? could mean that it was random. The C_I_A does not kid around so please be extra careful and don’t get yourself in any “dents�? but if you do just remember it’s not random and somebody out there just want to mess you up and get away with your money.

Some nonsense…

May 3, 2006 at 8:28 am · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails

It was a joyous and momentous moment in colonial history. The colonists’ had returned at last to MD, to restore a sense of civility amongst the population. The formation of MD’s Gentlemen’s Club or MDGC is a historic moment that shall not fade from living memory. Its club house is located behind MD’s chemistry labs and is a remarkable work of engineering and architecture. The club currently has 60-strong members, all of course, are gentlemen of the highest standard and pedigree. The club has no president but a chairman and he is none other than Lord Kelvin, an esteemed scholar in MD.

The MDGC is a long, lost secret society and membership is strictly by invitation only. To be a member one must have a keen interest in the sports of golf, equestrian, cricket, motor sport and yachting. It has been a tradition for its member to hold a jamboree, every once or so in a blue moon. Amongst the activities organized by the MDGC are golf clinics, polo matches, motor racing and yachting. Members of this crazy order also have a nonsensical hobby or past-time.

Among the hobbies of Lord Kelvin is time-keeping. Time-keeping is a craft which requires high-precision and a lot of perseverance. After all, Greenwich upon which world time is calculated from is in England (you know GMT!). Another of his odd hobbies is smoking pipes. Like Sherlock Holmes in olden days, the members and Lord Kelvin indulge themselves in smoking pipe at the club house at every meeting or ’session’ as they call it.

To distinguish a member from a non-member it is actually quite easy. They all speak as if their mouths were filled with cotton in a thick Derbyshire accent plus they smell of half-burnt tobacco. The members are all handsome fellows and recently the MDGC has also accepted ladies in. although it’s quite odd to see a lady in the MDGC club house as there isn’t any toilets for girls. It seems that the changes are due to Lord Kelvin’s budding romance with a lady.

It also seems rather suitable to say that the MDGC is in fact a nut-house full of crazy people and they all enjoy fastening each other’s bow-tie. So in honour of Lord Kelvin, chairman of the prestigious MDGC, I end with his favourite remark, “Aright, yer bloody scoundrels, let’s smoke some of that pipe. Ho!�?

A wheel is round…Initial MD begins…

April 24, 2006 at 12:15 pm · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails, Initial MD

On a fine sunny day when everything seems to be detached from reality, a bunch of people gathered together for something earthling’s call ‘hanging out’. It’s worth noting that in MD, students spend much more of their PS for ‘hanging out’ than actual studying. So back to the bunch of people who were previously hanging out. The venue for this event was the infamous ruins of palaces located behind MD’s prestigious lawns. In ‘hanging out’ at this particular locale, they usually partake in a local tradition of ‘inhalement’. ‘Inhalement’ is when a person puts to his mouth, a piece of rolled cellulose in which contains a substance known to carry 20,000 poisons, this cylindrical object is then lit as to produce smoke which is then inhaled.

In accordance with local customs, the bunch of people was participating in an ‘inhalement’ ritual and once they had enough, they tried to figure out something to do. They were bored, you see and so they turned on their CD players found in their vehicles (people who ‘hang’ at the back is statistically proven to possess a valid driver’s license and so cars). As the huge subwoofers and or Hi Fi stereo systems blasted music into the ruins some of them were still bored. At precisely this instant, one them had a moment of pure, undoubtedly genius. As he too possesses that flimsy piece of rectangular paper which said that he was a valid driver and in his pocket was to be found a key to an automobile, he decided to go on a drive.

He asked his homies if anyone wanted to join him and two of the not so brightest agreed to join him in his quest. The three of them got into the car and as he started to drive, he was overcame by another his gut instinct. For you see he was avid Need for Speed: Underground gamer and right now he felt he was good enough to do what he had, on many occasions on the PS2 performed. “Hey, want me to show you how to do drifting?�? he asks his startled passengers. Too smoked from ‘inhalement’ they agree but now there was dilemma, where can they drift? Oh, drifting is a form of reckless driving whose aim is to wear the car’s tyre. Drifting was made popular by Taiwanese F1 driver turned singer, Jay Chou in his movie Initial D.

He looked and there it was the perfect track, MD’s hilly, bendy and bumpy side roads flanked by houses on side and a steep embankment on the other. He revved his engine, checked his windshield and waited for the road to empty. In no time he was off and just like in the movie and in the game, he was drifting. Overcame with joy, the three of them drove on or is it drifted on?

However, it their joy was not to be, the car suddenly loses control as he allegedly tries to avoid a cat. His car skids of the road towards the high hill and it crashes into it, his front end looking like a crumpled piece of paper. Like flies, the three of them rushes out of the car and thankfully they emerge unscathed. The car was a mess and they were indeed in deep shit. Calls were made and like vultures their gangs arrive on the scene and first of all, they laughed at the absurdity of it. They took pictures with them posing in front of the broken car like it was a historic moment. The police soon arrived and first on the drivers mind is will his rectangular piece paper become revoked. No said the policemen and he giggled a most stupid of giggles.

He proceeded to explain that he as a concern animal lover, tried to avoid hitting a cat. In the process of which he accelerated, went off the road and hit the hill. What he didn’t tell them was that he was actually drifting and the cat was actually a mirage produced by his delusional mind. Nevertheless, he got away and the insurance company took care of the car. Moral of the story, if you’re involved in an accident always talk about cats to the cops. Who wouldn’t believe that you were trying to avoid a poor animal like a CAT!

So here ends one of the first instalments of a series of car-related tales which shall be known as Initial MD. Those whose cars will feature in this subheading in MDtails are Candy and his notorious Suzuki Vitara and other renowned MD race drivers. Oh ya, the earlier part, it was actually just crap to bore you people and see who would read this till the end. But if you want to be featured in Initial MD feel free to contact the C_I_A through the MD forum.

One fine April morning…

April 18, 2006 at 1:39 pm · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails

On a hot and humid April day, everything seems so fine, seems so right but in the stillness of the air an evil brews. What secrets lay hidden behind the façade of this beautiful day? Until now the C_I_A has been going through a stroke of luck and not just any luck, it’s darn hell good luck and may it continue. Ok, back to the April day incident, the C_I_A with deep sadness informs the loyal followers of this rant that the C_I_A has witnessed not 1 but 3 acts of war (to be known as AOW from now on).

The first such AOW on the serene April morning was done by an unknown entity in which posters allegedly depicting ‘extra immoral activities’ done by a popular member of the college were pasted throughout the college. C_I_A agents have said that the posters contain pictures of the popular member kissing with his/her boyfriend/girlfriend and other immoral activities of which the C_I_A has no knowledge.

The C_I_A has been doing its utmost best in obtaining a copy of the said poster but to no avail. It seems that the school’s internal security mechanism has beaten the C_I_A best agents however the C_I_A never gives up and will try to infiltrate the college’s SA to get a copy.

It is believed that the posters were sprung of hate and a case of jealousy between two popular members of the college’s social community. This is however only hypothetical given the C_I_A’s secretive nature. For the cold, hard facts the C_I_A recommends the Encyclopaedia Britannica volume 7.

Talk around the college, is that the librarian’s have gone cuckoo and berserk in their heads. Racist remarks were heard in the pristine environment of the learned- the library. Nooo! Not the library shouts MD’s hard-core library junkies. In fact, the C_I_A can confirm that such an incident did take place based on phone film clips obtained through C_I_A agents. To be safe the C_I_A will now say that we did witness it first-hand and it’s true.

This incident has increased tensions in Chinatown and tempers are believed to be boiling, so to calm things down, the C_I_A did a little checking. It seems that this whole thing was a misunderstanding. It has now been confirmed that the librarian did not say the word ‘ALL’ in her provocative remark but meant the remark only to the person not the whole bunch of people who have the same racial status as the alleged victim.

The C_I_A through exclusive interviews with sources close to Uncle Sam knows that the alleged victim has been sent to see Uncle Sam and was ordered to apologise to the librarian. The whole incident reached its climax with the librarian refusing to accept the alleged victims apology and the victim being blacklisted from the library. The C_I_A also wishes to inform the general public that the incident only involved 1 librarian not the whole gang, so it’s still safe to go to the library.

In closing, the C_I_A and the black eyed peas wishes to ask everyone, Where is the love?? and as for the third AOW, we got sick of writing hate stories so we decided not to put it up but if you’re curious there’s always the Encyclopaedia Britannica. PEACE out !!

The exams are coming !!!

April 13, 2006 at 10:57 am · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails, General

It’s time for a reality check! June AS level exams are only weeks away and the question of the moment is how ready are you ?!! Too bad for me I’m not sitting for it which in many ways can be either good or bad although all the issues associated with it are bad. But hey who cares right?

It’s that time of a students life again when everything turns into a living hell and based on the AS timetables it gives very little time for you people who are sitting for it to relax, hang up your shoes and sip some lemonade. Not does it give me any problems with all this free time of course.

My fate is pretty much sealed, and in my last venture into public exams in November last year I did quite well and I’m hoping that every one of you would and should do well. Nothing breaks my heart more than a lousy exam result and having to sit for it again!.

Anyhow for those of you who like to fail just for the sheer pleasure of failing, keep it up because I too have this great tendency to fail. After all only from failure can one succeed. I remember an incident a few years ago when a wise man once said,�? Failure is the mother of success” and how it inspired me to 3 back to back failures in math before making the great comeback and getting third in class.

Failure is the nectar of life and for those people who have never failed, you have my sincerest condolences. Failure is a wonderful feeling, it is humbling and it teaches you a lesson and from it one can learn and reach greater heights.

Recently I read a quote from Claude Bernard in which he said,�? The constancy of the internal environment is the condition for free life”, I’m not sure how this quote is suppose to inspire you people to succeed but I’m sick of all the do-well and study hard crap so this ones fine.

So remember in times of failure and success the C_I_A will be there to help you through it all. After all what is the use of a secretive government agency if not for collecting all the shit and crap about people’s life. So here are some examination tips from the C_I_A;

a. Intelligence is good if you know how to use it
b. Cheating is bad but if it helps, do it!
c. Good eyesight never fails, take a peek at your neighbours’ answers – only to compare of course!
d. There is no such thing as last minute study because studying is still studying – time is only a factor
e. Read your prayers and just hope the paper isn’t in German like what the hell is ‘Answer ALL the questions in this section’ supposed to mean?
f. Worse come to worse, save your energy and sleep for your preparation for the next paper

So til next time, cya. Oh some of you might wonder if I’ve gone cuckoo or something talking about exams well I’m not. This is just a timely reminder of how near the exams are and I’m thinking of writing something on one of the most under utilised avenues of learning that is a very crucial skill in tests and exams, so til that episode, Sayonara.

Btw, more musclemen tales, a racist incident and coming up the latest on Loo’s saga into the unknown plus who wants to know about Rollo Polo?.
Welcome!!!

April 13, 2006 at 10:36 am · Author: C_I_A · Filed under Mdtails

Hola!!

This blog will detail interesting happenings and stories aka incidents that occur in MD with excruciating detail as found in many Bio txtbooks. Do enjoy and if you’re bored with this blog, you can write your own one. If you’re offended with any of my crazy tales just remember most of it is only 75% true or are they true? So enjoy.